Dice Monkeys

Archive for the ‘Quotes From The Gaming Table’ Category

These are things said during our gaming sessions over the years. No offense is intended, and some of these are kind of risque. Our group has managed to turn Rolemaster into Pornmaster.:)

1. “Tell the priest to probe deeper. “– Ken during a Bureau 13 game
2. “25 does not go into 5. “– Dawn during a Rolemaster gaming dividing treasure.
3. “I am looking for locks on the bamboo curtain. “– Bri during a Rolemaster game.
4. “If at first you don’t succeed, failure may be your style. “– Morrigan T to Kashin during a Rolemaster game.
5. “You were blessed by the Gods of failure.” — Bri to Chris same game and after watching Chris fumble 5 times in a row.
6. “As far as being a wizard, you make a great fighter. “– Bri to Tim during a Rolemaster game after he fumbled and his spell blew up in his face, not once, but TWICE.
7. “What is it with you people spraying my character with body fluids??” — Jeff to the group after the 10th time of his character Garron getting sprayed with some type of body fluids that session.
8. “I can’t take her with us?  Fine, then I am going to kill her.  IF I CAN’T HAVE HER NO ONE CAN!” — Emma J during a Fringeworthy game after being told she could not take the flavor text old lady sitting on her porch feeding her chicken with us.
9. *Arm thrust in the air excitedly*  “I KICK ASS!! DINAE!!” — Emma J during a Rolemaster session when she finally rolled a major crit.
10. Dice Monkey–  “Bri what are you doing??”  Bri– “I am turning him into a bike rack.”  Dice Monkey– “You are turning the Orcan commander into a bike rack???!!”   Bri — “Yeah, for his soldiers to enjoy…”  — Pornmaster night… Mithrellas tied up the Orcan commander in the bike rack position, bent him leaning over a hitching post with his pants down around his ankles.  YOU DO THE MATH!